She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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