i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
