it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I need water and some morals
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
