Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
