i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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