Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
