if you like me you must not know who I am
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
