one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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