dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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