Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
