How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
