It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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