Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
