Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
