Are we in a gay sports bar?
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
