I can text with my tongue
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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