Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
