but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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