Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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