He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
