I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
that's an acceptable place to lick
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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