You're so nebulous sometimes
You're completely useless in the revolution.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
