Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
