Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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