I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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