Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
