im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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