They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
