OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize