We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
