Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Randomize
