absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
