my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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