this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize