can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
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