You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize