I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
