Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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