We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize