Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
