thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
