could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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