Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
