i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
