im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
