did you get engaged???
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
