Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
