Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
