It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
