Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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