It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
