What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
